我们到底在争论什么？：如何将冲突转化为对话

English | September 3rd, 2024 | ISBN: 1538182246 | 265 pages | True PDF | 1.02 MB

Relationship specialist Lisa Brateman, LCSW offers couples strategies that will help them fight better so they can transform conflicts into conversations, in a book that Booklist says, "will likely help many couples."

What Are We Really Fighting About? How to Transform Conflicts into Conversations gives couples permission to fight. Because, after all, everyone does. They fight about loaded issues like financial infidelity and different ways of spending money, sexual infidelity, working too much, traveling too much, fighting too much, not being involved in childcare, interfering in-laws, levels of intimacy, routine sex or boring sex, body image, guilt, secrets, vulnerability, hopes, and fears. And the elephant in the room: Why won't he/she /they change?

We're so conditioned to think that all fights and arguments are bad, but that isn't true. This book shows couples that fighting can be productive if they learn to fight in a way that isn't hurtful and shift away from entrenched patterns that aren't working. It's okay to feel angry with a partner and have a heated argument if couples fight with respect, acceptance, and love—and then reconcile differences and disagreements.

What Are We Really Fighting About? shows couples exactly how to change sides—to understand their partners' pain, to acknowledge and appreciate their perspective, and ultimately to create an environment where vulnerability is welcome. Many examples of couples who have successfully mastered the art of productive arguments will enable readers to use these techniques in their own relationships. As a result, readers will learn how to fight better by articulating what they need and what is possible, and then find ways to make conflict productive and healthy. Developing the skills to turn conflicts into conversations will open the space for understanding.

中文|2024年9月3日|ISBN:1538182246|265页|True PDF|1.02 MB关系专家Lisa Brateman，LCSW在一本书中提供了帮助夫妻更好地战斗的策略，这样他们就可以将冲突转化为对话，Booklist说，这本书“可能会帮助许多夫妻” 我们到底在争论什么？《如何将冲突转化为对话》让情侣们有权吵架。毕竟，每个人都是这样。他们为诸如财务不忠和不同的花钱方式、性不忠、工作太多、旅行太多、打架太多、不参与儿童保育、干涉法律、亲密程度、常规性行为或无聊的性行为、身体形象、内疚、秘密、脆弱性、希望和恐惧等沉重的问题而争吵。房间里的大象：他/她/他们为什么不改变？ 我们习惯于认为所有的争吵和争论都是不好的，但事实并非如此。这本书向夫妻们展示了，如果他们学会以一种无害的方式打架，并摆脱根深蒂固的不起作用的模式，打架可以是富有成效的。如果夫妻双方在尊重、接受和爱的基础上争吵，然后调和分歧和分歧，那么对伴侣感到愤怒并发生激烈争吵是可以的。 我们到底在争论什么？向情侣们展示了如何改变立场——理解伴侣的痛苦，承认和欣赏他们的观点，并最终创造一个欢迎脆弱的环境。许多成功掌握了富有成效的争论艺术的夫妇的例子将使读者能够在自己的关系中使用这些技巧。因此，读者将通过阐明他们的需求和可能性来学习如何更好地战斗，然后找到使冲突富有成效和健康的方法。培养将冲突转化为对话的技能将为理解开辟空间。

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